The prelude to Dad’s move to the new residential home was a prayerful, anxious start. My mind would not stop racing because the night before, he looked so bad, I was afraid he wouldn’t make it in time for the move. I had to call on God, pray all night, and this morning, looked up some specific passages to try and calm myself.
As you can see, my blood pressure was ridiculously high, and it wasn’t until my brother got here and talked to me that i started to calm myself. We were scheduled to meet with Micheal at 12:30, but I was confused and thought he meant at the nursing home. No, he wanted to meet at his house so we could decide how to proceed. We wanted him out of the nursing home immediately, and he said, ” Great! We are ready to go.”
That was the fastest transfer in history! It felt like a jailbreak, lol! I had Dad packed in about 10 minutes, we talked to the staff and thanked them for all their help, but understand, Dad needs 24/7 care, which you are not staffed to provide. They understood and helped us get his meds gathered and said we’d take care of the paperwork later. Dad was in his new home and we were back home by 4pm! He was comfortable, ate good dinner, and Micheal sent us an update. I am over the moon relieved and happy that Dad is in a caring and loving place! I will update further after our afternoon vist tomorrow. I’m going to bed to get some true rest, thanks be to God!
I have felt my heartbeat quicken and known my blood pressure was up several times through this ordeal with Dad. In fact, we are all experiencing blood pressure fluctuations.
I combat mine with self medication, like CBD, a beverage, and my 1/2 Valium every night. Dad has bp meds, but I don’t have a clue if they are giving them correctly. You cant find a central person in this facility that knows what the other shifts are doing. It is so frustrating. I cannot wait until we move him to the new residential care center. maybe are hearts will all be better for it!
The only problem that seems to be resolved is the safety issue. Everyone is watching to make sure he doesn’t fall, but one nurse seems to care and the others seem clueless. Ugh! My brother is in pain, because he had surgery, then overdid it, and now has a UTI. His bp is up too.
We have a meeting with the owner of the residential care house Wednesday, we put a deposit on the place today. Friday, we have a meeting with the elder lawyer and will go ahead and retain him to fight for Dads VA benefits, which will help pay the rent. Then switch him to traditional Medicare, and add part D to cover the meds. The first month we’ll just pay private pay.
Pray all goes smoothly, and this ordeal will get better. Thanks be to God, for He is in control, not me!
I don’t know the significance of a red dawn. Does it mean it’s going to be a good day? I hope so because this is been one hell of a week. 😊🙏🤗
I thought about ending it there but I just have to say that I have Hope today because I think we might have found a place for my dad to go once he leaves the rehab center he’s in. I’m about to speak to an elder lawyer just to make sure we have all our ducks in a row. I’m still waiting to hear back from the VA on his benefits. A nice lady at a different facility said she would check into it for me whether I come there with my dad or not -wasn’t that nice?!
I’m trying to forget all the other details like selling the house and things like that and focus mainly on dad’s care. The place I’m considering seems to fit the bill. Seems to have a great care team, it’s not fancy, but care what you’re looking for…the best care. if we find this isn’t a good fit or if he doesn’t like it, we will move him somewhere else -but he’ll be somewhere safe in the meantime. The fight isn’t over with Medicare and the VA, but will wade through that slowly while he’ll be receiving good care.
I found out yesterday he was still getting a laxative I don’t know how long that’s been going on but I’m pretty sure that’s why your stomach‘s been hurting and he stopped eating very much. So the nurse is going to take him off of the Senokot, and add a medication that supposed to increase his appetite and work on depression. I don’t know that he’s depressed but he might be so I okayed it. i’ll be going to visit him after I finish talking to the lawyer and see what his state of mind is today. With any luck will have him in his new place by the end of the week. It’s close, so we can visit anytime we want. Wish us luck, and yall have a great day!
Thanks for reading, listening, and responding as we continue our journey. 🤗 I appreciate each and everyone of you!
It may be a five-star rated facility, but it doesn’t make the grade as far as I’m concerned.
Yesterday, I had to get my dad up and to the bathroom on my own, because I couldn’t find an aide with a search warrant. When I complained to the nurse, she looked lost, but finally showed up a few minutes later to help me raise him back up in the bed.…which I had to put him back in. I have also been telling her that his stomach has hurt for three days, he is barely eating, and she could not find any nurse notes to support this.
This is unacceptable. He is in the facility because in my care, he lost his balance and fell, breaking four ribs. What if he had fallen again while I was doing THEIR job?? When my favorite aide and nurse are on duty, I never have to worry about the level of care Dad is getting. This is only part of the problem with this facility. Being understaffed is a problem everywhere, but if you give a damn, things still get done adequately. I don’t want adequate care for my dad, I want excellent care!
The other problem is no customer service. When we first entered the facility, it was by transport from the hospital. No one came to the room to help get Dad settled in or explain how anything worked for almost an hour. I don’t know if you recall from my post back then, but I went home and cried all night, thinking I’d picked a horrible place for my dad to go. Since my brother and I have been touring other facilities, we now know how its normally done, and this place is just not managed properly. There is no one person to speak to that gives you the lowdown on what’s offered, or the price per day, or services. We have had to ask each person working with my dad individually, I’ve never met the DON, or the marketing person (if they even have one) and all of this while trying to fight Medicare and get assistance from the VA.
Is it any wonder I have to knock myself out to sleep every night? I don’t know if I can trust them to take care of my dad once he is released from rehab, because the skilled nursing hall is even more understaffed. If Medicare keeps denying his stay, we will have to go to private pay, and at a grade I’m giving the facility at a C, I don’t know if it’s worth 5,500.00 per month!
On the other hand, his PT, OT, and speech therapy have been pretty good. He was able to stand up and pivot into the wheelchair, use the grab bar in the bathroom to assist me as I lowered him onto the toilet, stand as he was being cleaned up, roll himself around with his feet in the wheelchair, and walk on the walker (assisted) down the hall a few feet. He uses his feet and the hand rail to guide himself along the floor, and the speech therapist has him using his communication board more to ask for what he needs. So I guess the therapy department deserves a B at least. Please pray with me that Medicare and the VA come through so I can get my dad into a better facility. We are supposed to go tour one today that is a VA rated or approved or something like that.
I have my list of to-do’s like I have for the last 5 days, one being to alert the VA to his current status, find out if we need to reschedule his hearing aid fitting because I don’t know how we get him there, tour the new facilities, go visit and find out if they called for a doctor visit like I asked them to, and more. It’s going to be a busy Monday! Yall have a good day and I’ll keep you posted on our journey.
I have filled so many notebooks with study notes, and stories, I’m sure I have enough material to teach a class or write a book, but my heart’s just not in it right now.
My dad was moved from the hospital to the rehab center Friday night, and I came home and cried the rest if the night, fearing he was in a bad place and I hated to leave him there. I felt he didn’t want me to go, but was somewhat assured after I fed him his supper and they lowered his bed to practically sit on the floor. See, there are no rails on the bed, because in Texas, it’s considered a restraint (or so they told me) and he has four broken ribs and is a fall risk, so I was freaking out a bit.
To say nothing of the fact that he just went from having morphine and other pain drugs to nothing but Tylenol 3, I was just a wreck Friday night. I literally had to knock myself out to go to sleep. The next morning, Saturday, my husband and I went back there to visit and take him some clothes he would need for Physical Therapy today, he was resting comfortably and was asleep. We didn’t disturb him, but I went back later for a short visit. I can’t stay long, because they make you wear an N95 mask, a long plastic gown and gloves just to visit your person there. We didn’t even have to do that in the hospital!!
Yesterday, after being informed he “scooted” himself out of bed and onto the floor, I went for a short visit and he had been bathed and shaved, and was at the nurses desk so they could watch him. It isn’t an ideal situation, but at least he is being taken care of well. Today I have tons of people to call and inform of his location, so they have it on record. All of his doctors, the VA, and his former Home Health need to know. You have to do all the work these days. Once he is done with rehab -which should take about two weeks- should determine whether he will be able to go into assisted-living or a skilled nursing facility. Hopefully we will have heard from the benefits side of the VA by then because trust me they are already trying to kick him out of the rehab facility. I guess that’s a harsh way to say it, but the social worker there at the facility already came to me yesterday asking what the next step was and how we were going to pay for it. what does that sound like to you??